Sunday, May 04, 2008

Relationship Coaching

I entered the 2nd of 12 Coaching courses this weekend with the group at This 12 part series is part of my Transformational Coaching Program. This particular weekend looked at Relationships.

First thing to understand about relationship is that it is deeper than ones relationship to self and to a partner. It involves all aspects of our relationships including but not limited to family, partner, food, health, job, spirituality, self and so on. This is important not only as a coach but also as a human being to have clarity on this perspective of 'relationship'.

Some keys in relationships I gathered from the Class
*Shifting your relationship to your perspectives (i.e. thoughts, stories, perceptions, interpretations, etc.)
*Release your relationship to Attachments
*Relationship to attachments & stories delude the mind (through the creation of illusions) and thus show our ineffective ability to listen to what is being communicated
*Separate from your story(s) to be able to anticipate situations enabling a response that has no attachments and comes from a place of compassion, kindness and love.
*Your choice is synonomous to your relationship
*Manifestation is the circumstance, how "it" all comes together is a result of our relationships
*Understand what your intentions are in the relationship (go beyond the surface and the vulnerability to get to the real truth).

Context Exercise from our instructors (
*What is True for you regarding relationship? What are your beliefs, interpretations, assumptions, and expectations?

*What actions do you take based on what is true for you regarding relationships?

*If you were to look at your actions resulting from your context about relationship, what would say you are committed to?

*Based on this context you have about relationship, what would you say is currently impossible?

*If now what appears impossible became possible, what would the experience of that reality feel like? What is the quality of the experience?

*List these qualities, and consider this list a position or stand from which yyou can think, feel, and act.

*Coming from this position or stand, what would you say is true about relationship?

Common Things or Issues Seen in Relationships (my reflection)
*Attachment and more to the point Attachment to the outcome
*It is Personal at least that is how people perceive it to be
*Fear (related to the ego, attachment and taking things personal)
*Control Issues
*All about 'triggers'

Their is more to each of these but they serve as the underlying things and EGO is number 1.

My Final Take
As a coach it is my role to act as a guide, to translate and facilitate holding an open and encouraging space the transformation of the person. It is not about fixing and healing but more about allowing the situation to emerge and birth itself. My role is to serve the client as they work to their goal and in the process hold them accountable all while empowering them.

O Kage Sama: Gratitude for all that brought me to the present

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